Retail Training for Seven Hours + Split Shift= FML & $$$

You’ve never really lived until you’ve gone through seven hours of Sears Softlines MCA training. From corrupted PowerPoint files to 80 page pamphlets that tell you how to do your job correctly, it’s an event that could easily thrill hardcore adrenaline junkies. Inspecting the sales floor, changing the men’s department, and carrying ladders and tall polls are just a few of the activities you’ll participate in. Sounds fun, eh?

If you thought that was fun, start the whole seven hour event at 7 in the morning. Go home at 2 in the afternoon, rest for a few hours, and then come back to work at 5 and work until close.

I really hate split shifts. I would rather just work the entire ten hours all at once then split it into two separate shifts. I easily went through a gallon and a half of gas  just driving back and forth between my house and work.

To show my appreciation for split shifts, I made a random wardrobe change during the three hour break. I changed from my usual uniform to this:

Split shifts make me want to kick babies and verbally abuse the elderly.

Why did I randomly decide to wear vest, tie, and a nice dress shirt to work instead of the usual polo? I don’t know. I was hoping it would disguise my disdain for working the split shift.

So that’s it. I went to work and learned how to do my job “correctly”. Life goes on. I’m going swimming tomorrow, so I need to get to sleep at a decent time.

Thanks for reading, and leave your comments, suggestions, etc. below. 😉

– Will